Jesus Camp

I was just thinking that I have been to a Jesus Camp. I started to freak out that I have gone through something like that. When I was 14 I went to EFY. EFY stands for Especially for Youth. That is a one week of these trips you take to a college somewhere usually in Utah or close surrounding states. At the college, you have a dorm room with one other same sex person. You have different activities and you talk about the church a lot. It's a whole five day week where you are in church mood 24 hours a day. That fucking FREAKS me out. How messed up is that? On top of that, it is a boot camp for training for missionaries. It is replicating a similar life to that of a missionary. You have one companion and you talk about the church all day long. I was a part of that. I was in training to be a missionary. And now I absolutely hate that. And now it's even harder to have to look back to my past in horror. Now I realize how much my past has fucked me up, and it just freaks me out and gives me nightmares thinking about it. It forever haunts me thinking about it. This may not make much sense to those of you not born into religion, but if you could try to step in to that mentality right now you can get a glimpse of what how much of a burden religion is to those you fall away from it and come to terms of reality.